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Post by Murphio on Mar 9, 2016 0:54:27 GMT
Dragowarkiblugh is here, and I have never once admitted to drinking tea. Anti-Soard, however, I will rightfully claim as mine own.You have arrived. Chaos is far, far stronger than you and is about to destroy you and your fellow Ancients. What will you do? Current bonuses: An extra tripled roll is added to your roll, then multiplied by 16, then added by 150. Chaos has a .x6 debuff but a large x1000 multiplier. Health: Dragonwarkiblugh: 5,000/5,000 Chaos: 2,000,000/2,000,000 |
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Dragowarkiblugh
A failure of an Ancient
Ancient of Pirates and Tea-Drinking
Posts: 53 
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Post by Dragowarkiblugh on Mar 9, 2016 0:58:43 GMT
Ancient of Pirates you say?
Very well then, I shall pirate Chaos and plunder its riches. For every point of damage, I shall try to remove that much from its body and use it against itself.
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Post by Murphio on Mar 9, 2016 1:15:26 GMT
Plundering Goodness bonus applied: Chaos's missing health is added to your roll, BEFORE that turn's damage is dealt.
Round 1 Results:
Dragowarkiblugh: Does not attack while preparing a new bonus
Chaos: 2 (x1000) = 2,000 x.6 = 1,200
Health:
Dragowarkiblugh: 3,800/5,000
Chaos: 2,000,000/2,000,000
Chaos's initial blow is weakened by the distractions from other Ancients and by the fact that it is also a kitten in the first 3 dimensions. The gigantic golden abomination does not hesitate to attack again, though, after sensing no attack coming from Dragowarkiblugh.
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Dragowarkiblugh
A failure of an Ancient
Ancient of Pirates and Tea-Drinking
Posts: 53
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Post by Dragowarkiblugh on Mar 9, 2016 1:20:43 GMT
A clarification if you will, does this apply to only one attack, or all of them?
Whilst pondering this, I shall throw the PIRATE TEA-CUPS OF ULTIMATE SING-SLAUGHTERING at Chaos.
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Post by Murphio on Mar 9, 2016 1:29:22 GMT
From now on, all of your attacks will deal extra damage equal to all of the damage you have inflicted on previous rounds. It takes a pirate to think of something cunning like that.
Round 2 Results:
Dragowarkiblugh: 1 + 5*3 = 16 (x16) = 256 + 150 = 406
Chaos: 1 (x1000) = 1,000 x.6 = 600
Health:
Dragowarkiblugh: 3,200/5,000
Chaos: 1,999,594/2,000,000
A good start of a whopping 406 damage. By "whopping", though, we mean "abysmal", because Chaos hardly feels the bursting PIRATE TEACUPS OF ULTIMATE SING-SLAUGHTERING. The good news is that it evidently distracts it so much with scalding tea that its counterattack sucks just as much. Furious and in a frenzy, Chaos teleports by freezing time and plans a suckerpunch for double damage next turn.
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Dragowarkiblugh
A failure of an Ancient
Ancient of Pirates and Tea-Drinking
Posts: 53
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Post by Dragowarkiblugh on Mar 9, 2016 1:40:48 GMT
Freezing time, hmm? I can do that too!
I pull out my handcannon and load it with a rolled up 'atomica' of smuggled hashish. If this stuff is strong enough, it should be able to mess with his mind and make him more vulnerable.
On second thought, I'm going to spend this next 'round' loading this hand cannon, so that perhaps my kush can quasi-dimensionally fuck his shit next I fire it.
"In tha wyrds of Grandpa-General Oldmor, 'We'ed better get ta werk, else them salty pirates is gonna hash our browns real good!"
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Post by Murphio on Mar 10, 2016 2:14:01 GMT
Round 3 Results:
Dragowarkiblugh: 6 +5*3 = 21 (x16) = 336 + 150 = 486 + 406 plundered = 892 bonus damage to next round's handcannon
Chaos: 6 (x1000) = 6,000 x.6 = 3,600 x2 = 7,200
Health:
Dragowarkiblugh: -400/5,000
Chaos: 1,999,594/2,000,000
The cannon charges, but Chaos teleports behind and delivers a disgustingly powerful blow to the back of the skull, killing Dragowarkiblugh instantly.
CHAOS WINS-
But a Dragowarkiblugh from an alternate dimension where apples look like sponges appears out of a portal, ready to fire that handcannon.
Health:
Dragowarkiblugh: 3,000/3,000
Chaos: 1,999,594/2,000,000
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Dragowarkiblugh
A failure of an Ancient
Ancient of Pirates and Tea-Drinking
Posts: 53
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Post by Dragowarkiblugh on Mar 10, 2016 12:21:53 GMT
Never, ever, doubt a pirate.
QUASI-DIMENSIONAL KUSH PISTOL ENGAGE!
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El'En'Gee
A failure of an Ancient
Ancient of Gods and Creation
Posts: 87
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Post by El'En'Gee on Mar 10, 2016 15:19:17 GMT
El'En'Gee's Effigy creates a second quasi-dimensional kush pistol, and fires it alongside.
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Post by Murphio on Mar 11, 2016 13:55:39 GMT
Round 4 Results:
Dragowarkiblugh: 6 + 4*3 = 18 (x16) = 288 + 150 = 438 + 892 charge = 1330 + 406 plundered = 1736
Chaos: 4 (x1000) = 4,000 x.6 = 2,400
Health:
Dragowarkiblugh: 600/3,000
Chaos: 1,997,808/2,000,000
The quasi-dimesional kush pistols pling almost harmless off of Chaos's golden, swirling exterior. Almost. Your damage continues to steadily rise, but alternate dimensions won't be able to save you from death forever.
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Dragowarkiblugh
A failure of an Ancient
Ancient of Pirates and Tea-Drinking
Posts: 53
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Post by Dragowarkiblugh on Mar 11, 2016 14:27:07 GMT
Ancients damn it!
Then it is time to reveal my trump card. What exactly is Dragowarkiblugh's Design, you ask?
It's a fleet of airships. If I'm able to sip enough tea behind my wall of ships, I might be able to restore my vigor and devise a plan.
Actually, I already have a plan, but I need to not die to pull it off. COME FORTH MY FLEET OF ARGHMORRIGANS, SMITE DOWN MY FOE AND PROTECT ME FROM HARM!
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Post by Murphio on Mar 15, 2016 20:17:06 GMT
Round 5 Results:
Dragowarkiblugh: 5 + 4*3 = 17(x16) = 272 + 150 = 422 + 2192 plundered = 2614-ship fleet summoned, 2614 damage dealt
Chaos: 2 (x1000) = 2,000 x.6 = 1,200
Health:
Dragowarkiblugh: 600/3,000
Chaos: 1,995,194/2,000,000
1,414 ships remaining: 1/1
The ships form a defensive blockade, and though they sustain heavy loses, they prevent every single tick of damage from reaching Dragowarkiblugh. A +1 bonus is applied for every ship still standing, as well.
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Dragowarkiblugh
A failure of an Ancient
Ancient of Pirates and Tea-Drinking
Posts: 53
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Post by Dragowarkiblugh on Mar 15, 2016 21:20:24 GMT
Alright then. This should do it right good it should.
"OY CHAOS? ARE YA THIRSTY? HOW ABOUT SOME TEA DE EARL DEATH!"
The fleet is going to shoot shrapnel cannonballs filled with teabags at the enemy, whilst I start drinking my strong liquors to increase my longevity.
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Post by Murphio on Mar 16, 2016 0:11:42 GMT
Round 6 Results:
Dragowarkiblugh: 1 + 1*3 = 4(x16) = 64 + 150 = 214 + 4816 plundered = 5030 + 1414 = 6444 damage, as well as a heal and that number of ships created.
Chaos: 1 (x1000) = 1,000 x.6 = 600
Health:
Dragowarkiblugh: 7,044/3,000
Chaos: 1,988,750/2,000,000
7258 ships remaining: 1/1
The fleet grows. The damage is absorbed. The blow is struck against Chaos. The heal is supplied. The tea is sipped.
Do not let up: with a large enough fleet you will be safe from any attack and your damage will continue to rise staggeringly due to the Plundering passive.
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Post by Murphio on Mar 16, 2016 0:13:42 GMT
Bookingtenacity has just smacked Chaos over the head with a hammering blow so vast that Chaos loses 100k health in this fight.
Health:
Dragowarkiblugh: 7,044/3,000
Chaos: 1,888,750/2,000,000
7258 ships remaining: 1/1
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