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Post by Murphio on Mar 8, 2016 0:19:05 GMT
You have arrived. Chaos is far, far stronger than you and is about to destroy you and your fellow Ancients. What do you do? |
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Birmian
A failure of an Ancient
Posts: 27 
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Post by Birmian on Mar 8, 2016 0:25:15 GMT
Punch that fucker right in the hlegh
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Post by Murphio on Mar 8, 2016 0:33:27 GMT
Birmian: 5,000/5,000
Chaos: 2,000,000/2,000,000
Round 1 Results:
Birmain: 6
Chaos: 6 (x1000) = 6000
Health:
Birmian:-1,000/5,000
Chaos: 1,999,994/2,000,000
Birmian rears back and punches the massive, glowing omnipotent Chaos deity squarely in the hlegh, doing essentially nothing at all except pissing it off enough to retaliate in full, stepping on Birmian and killing him.
Birmian's special attribute of Dying Alot triggers on death, reviving him with an extra x10 multiplier on future rolls and 1.1x health!
Evoking his fellow ancient Murphio's Hlegh for an extra x8 multiplier!
Health:
Birmian: 5,500/5,500
Chaos: 1,999,994/2,000,000
Chaos is confused that Birmian is still standing even after expiring and rears back to punch him down into the arena floor.
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Birmian
A failure of an Ancient
Posts: 27
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Post by Birmian on Mar 8, 2016 0:42:01 GMT
Birmian bicycle kicks Chaos' fists and gives him the finger.
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Post by Murphio on Mar 8, 2016 0:48:46 GMT
Round 2 Results:
Birmian: 4 (x22) = 88
Chaos: 3 (x1000) = 3000
Health:
Birmian: 2,500/5,500
Chaos: 1,999,906/2,000,000
Birmian gains a little more power with his bicycle kicks, proudly doing hardly any visible damage at all. Chaos catches his lower body with its punch, crippling your right hlegh muscle. Hlegh attacks gain x.5 reduced effectiveness next turn.
Chaos stands on its hind legs and bellows with time energy to blast into Birmian.
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Birmian
A failure of an Ancient
Posts: 27
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Post by Birmian on Mar 8, 2016 0:50:11 GMT
Birmian summons a horde of demons the size of himself to kill him over and over and over again, reincarnating and using the dies a lot power.
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Post by Murphio on Mar 8, 2016 1:01:06 GMT
How much is "alot?" The dice says 4 is a lot.
Birmian dies 4 (x22) = 88 + 100 = 188 times, resurrecting every time and increasing his health to 332803204394.
Round 2 results:
Birmian does not attack as he dies over and over
Chaos: 2 (x1000) = 2000
Health:
Birmian: 332803202394/332803204394
Chaos: 1,999,906/2,000,000
Chaos backs up when it realizes it did hardly any damage at all to the incredibly now-fat Birmian.
....What? No.
Chaos is enraged and punches right at his fat belly.
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Birmian
A failure of an Ancient
Posts: 27
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Post by Birmian on Mar 8, 2016 1:06:05 GMT
Birmian uses his now extreme obesity to his advantage and tries to consume Chaos' fist hole on his mass while summoning a demon army, now not to kill their master but Chaos.
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Post by Murphio on Mar 8, 2016 1:11:50 GMT
Round 4 Results:
Birmian: 6 (x22) = 132 + 100 = 232
Chaos: 3 (x2000 for rage) = 6,000
Health:
Birmian: 332,803,142,394/332,803,204,394
Chaos: 1,999,674/2,000,000
Chaos cannot seem to destroy the massive quantities of lipids now occupying five hundred kilometers of volume as the demons swarm over it, nibbling at him and continually doing more damage, but not possibly enough to harm it.
This is moronic.
Chaos begins to Smite Birmian for percentage-based damage.
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Birmian
A failure of an Ancient
Posts: 27
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Post by Birmian on Mar 8, 2016 1:18:07 GMT
Birmian resurrects all of his demons who died who then go back to pestering Chaos. Birmian then raises his fat flabby arm and swings it across Chaos' body.
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Post by Murphio on Mar 8, 2016 1:25:26 GMT
A copy of El'En'Gee lends itself to your fight.
Round 5 Results:
Birmian: 3 + 5 (x22) = 176 + 100 = 276
Chaos: Smites for 15% x roll of 4 = 60% of Birmian's health.
Health:
Birmian: 83,200,785,598/332,803,204,394
Chaos: 1,999,398/2,000,000
Chaos's smite burns through incalculable storages of blubber, incinerating almost all of it and once again easily shielding itself from the tiny barrage of attacks from demons, Birmian's fatpunch and El'En'Gee's Effigy.
Chaos is angered further by the clone's arrival and empowers its next Smite.
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Birmian
A failure of an Ancient
Posts: 27
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Post by Birmian on Mar 8, 2016 1:28:32 GMT
Birmian summons all of the demons to form a big shaft on his head to act as a lightning rod and propel the smite hurdling back towards Chaos.
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Post by Murphio on Mar 8, 2016 1:35:07 GMT
Round 6 Results:
Birmian: 3 + 3 (x1, because pure lard just ain't a good conductor)= 6
Chaos: 15% x roll of 6 = 90% of Birmian's health
Health
Birmian: 8,320,078,566/332,803,204,394
Chaos: 1,999,392/2,000,000
Congratulations. Birmian redirects 6 damage back to Chaos. You scrub.
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Birmian
A failure of an Ancient
Posts: 27
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Post by Birmian on Mar 8, 2016 1:42:20 GMT
I summon the greatest demon of all, Soardlo, who's shear opness, dickheadness, and godmodding summon the four horsemen.
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El'En'Gee
A failure of an Ancient
Ancient of Gods and Creation
Posts: 87
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Post by El'En'Gee on Mar 8, 2016 1:43:35 GMT
El'En'Gee's Effigy summons Madamlestrauss alongside Birmian, incarnation of Soardlo and successor to his reign of terror.
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